Roles in Marriage

Have you ever been a part of  a play or acted in a skit? I have! As we all know, a play or skit has many roles that work together to make up a story, whether it be an animal, a particular character, or and object. I remember one of my most famous roles when I was a child. My brothers and I attended an acting camp at our local town theater and, if my memory serves me correctly, it must have been close to Christmas. At the end of camp we put on a play for the community. The reason I know it was around Christmas time was because I became famous that day. I transformed into the…Ginger Bread Man! Although it was a small role and I don’t know that anyone else remembers the role, I remember it well. My parents did not know it at the time, or maybe even now, but I was terrified and never wanted to act in a play again. My youngest brother, my oldest brother and my father were notorious for acting roles and thrived in that environment, but I never enjoyed being in front of a crowd.

However, little did I know, I would be playing a diverse set of roles the rest of my life, maybe not on a stage, but everything I have done has involved acting in some way. Just in my short life, I have have played out in many different roles in jobs I have heald. I played the “role” of maintenance man at a hospital. I played the “role” of football coach at a local high school. I was a camp counselor for a whole summer.  I also taught high school math classes. Now, I can easily say, “I am a therapist.” However, it’s also a role I play that has specific rules to make sure I play that role well, such as, ethics and abiding by HIPAA laws.

Roles are also very important in marriage too. Whether you think your are playing a role in marriage or not, you are! Knowing what the differences in the roles are and what the rules are that govern those roles, will most likely help you be a better husband or wife. We all play different roles in every aspect of our life. I want to help you start to be aware of these roles so you can gain more insight and understanding into your life so that you can improve the way you live.

Definition of a role

A role defined by Merrium-Webster Dictionary is “a socially expected behavior pattern usually determined by an individual’s status in a particular society,” “a part played by an actor or singer,” or “a function or part performed especially in a particular operation or process.” Based on these definitions, one can assume that a role is basically the way you behave in a particular  system, job, home, or other environment. So having the correct behavior or a particular role is important to play that role well. If we as husbands and wives are going to play our parts well, then we need to know what behaviors help to compliment the environment we live in so that we can attain a standing ovation in the “act of marriage.”

What roles do you play?

There are many types of roles we play in life. We usually play multiple roles at the same the time. At my job, I am in the roles of therapist, businessman, owner, salesman, marketer, and administrator. I am sure there are more, but that’s a nice sample. I have had other roles at the same time when I was a coach. When I coached high school football I played the role of coach, educator, scout, play designer, and role model. At home, I play multiple roles at the same time. I play the roles of father, husband, cleaner, maintenance man, dishwasher, and play mate with my children. All of those roles have many more aspects to them, but all the roles involved are important to help complete the story. In marriage, the roles of husband and wife are important, but what do those roles entail?

Knowing your role

I believe it is important to know your role, whether you are a husband or wife in order to provide the best marriage possible for your mate. So what does it mean to play the role of husband or wife. I believe that is important to understand so that we can compliment the role of our mate just as each role in the cast of a play, if acted out well compliments the other roles. Knowing your role helps you to be the best! I believe God has specific answers to how to play the role you are assigned to in marriage. God calls husbands to “love your wife” and wives to “respect your husband.” Yet, that is only one aspect of the role of husband and wife. What more does God have to say about the roles of husband and wife? Find out more by staying tuned to my next blog post: The Role of Husband: How to compliment your spouse Jesus’ way.

For more reading on roles in life read this article by Steven Aitchison.