How Resting Can Help Improve Your Marriage During Quarantine
I don’t know about you, but I have not been resting as much as I could be during this time at home with my family. I say could, because I know I have more time on my hands. I have somehow been able to fill that time with something to do. I actually feel more stressed and more tired at times than I did prior to all this craziness. I know I need more rest, and I believe it would help my wife and I improve our relationship.
Rest is important in your life. Ever wonder why God created us to rest? I believe rest was created to force us to slow down so we don’t miss so much. We get so caught up in our accomplishments that we do not take time to enjoy them. We just keep working and working and WORKING, because we want more. God did not necessarily create us to complete every task in the universe. He created us to ENJOY Him over everything else. I miss so much when I am focused on completing a task. It is hard for my wife to get my attention when I am so focused. Our need for rest is a blessing from a God who knows us best!
God rested on the seventh day. He said, “Come to me…I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28). God commanded the Israelites to keep the Sabbath Holy. The Bible talks about rest over and over. It must be important!
In marriage, rest is important, especially when you are juggling parenting, careers, households and yourself. That’s a lot to do. It’s overwhelming. How many of you mother’s out their are saying as you read this, “Brandon, you just don’t even know.” You are right. I don’t know! I do know to ask this question though, “With all this stuff to do, what are you going to do when you can’t take it anymore?”
I suggest not letting it get to that point. Stress builds and bursts. One way to manage stress is to get rest. Some benefits to rest are: improving thought organization, distance from the situation that causes stress, and giving a greater appreciation for what is happening. I heard someone who knew more than me say that studying right before bed helped them do better on a test. I also heard that while studying, taking a break every 45 minutes to an hour helps you to retain the information and helps to refocus the mind in order to study longer.
Rest doesn’t necessarily mean sleep. It can mean, resting the mind, or the muscles. Maybe taking a break from communication or spending quiet time together can be positive rest. Sometimes we just need a break in the activity of life. Rest can help improve your immune system. Too much activity or stress can decrease your immune systems ability to fight off sickness. Research suggests that sleep helps heal the body faster. REST IS GOOD!
So how can we use rest to improve our relationship?
Simply put, rest heals relationships and keeps them strong because you have more energy, clearer thinking and more enjoyment of the things around you. Getting adequate sleep helps your mind and body stay healthy. Sleep helps you think better and can help you regulate your emotions better. Anybody heard the phrase, “Sleep on it?” Decisions are sometimes better when a good night sleep happened right before the decision.
Taking breaks from each other can give you time to be alone or to enjoy activities you like that would not involve your partner.
Sometimes just sitting quietly together can be extremely soothing and enjoyable. Take the pressure off the need to be moving and doing. Start learning how to take time to smell the flowers and hear the birds. Take in the details of your life and you will feel more calm, whole and positive. Other types of rest can be active, such as, meditation and relaxation activities. By intentionally “resting,” you will be able to interact with your spouse or partner in a healthier, more relaxed way. Be creative and find ways you can rest together and apart. Rest your mind and your body. Create time in your busy schedule to take care of yourself through REST.
Resting is important! It can help you be a better person. It can improve your marriage. How are you going to define rest for you? My challenge to you is to define rest for yourself and your marriage. Then set some rules and parameters around how you are going to obtain that rest.
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