Marriage and Intimacy Insights Blog

Why Your Spouse Gets Defensive Instead of Taking Responsibility in Marriage

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why your spouse gets defensive instead of taking responsibility
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Apologizing for lying

How do I apologize for lying to my spouse?

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After much thought, research, and work with couples over the years, I believe an apology is important, but must be done in the right way. When you apologize to your husband or wife, it is important to be genuine and direct, to validate their feelings of hurt and fear, to understand their needs, and to state a plan of how you will work not to hurt your partner in the future. These 5 different aspects to apologizing will help your husband or wife to know that you are sorry for your actions, you care about their feelings, and you desire to make sure you change, not only, how you act, but how you are going to make it right.
Setting boundaries in marriage with a dishonest spouse

How to Set Boundaries with a Dishonest Spouse

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Has your spouse lied to you, left information out, or been dishonest in some other way? Dishonesty hurts relationships. Trust is broken. Feelings are hurt. The damage is done. As a wife or husband who has faced dishonesty in their relationship, you are probably wondering what you can do. In situations like these, especially if your spouse has lies chronically, boundaries are needed.
A couple reaching out and touching fingertips trying to connect. They want to know how to rebuild trust in their marriage that was broken due to lying.

How to Rebuild Trust in Marriage after Lying

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Is it possible to rebuild trust? You may be asking that question. You feel terrible about the mistake of lying to your spouse, but you are not sure how to reverse it. Your stuck between defending yourself and protecting yourself from their anger. Healing takes time and hopelessness wanes in situations like these. The question you are asking is,  "Is it possible to make things better?" As a marriage and family therapist, my answer is, "Yes!"
How do I talk to my partner about lying

How do I talk to my partner about lying?

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What is it like to be lied to? And how to you deal with a spouse that lies? To confront a spouse who lies, you first need to have a plan of how to talk to your partner about their dishonesty. You may be struggling with the pain of the most recent lie or the first one ever. Yet, you can't just stand by and wait for the next time, or let this go by without trying to understand, right?
Why do people lie in relationships

Why Do People Lie in Relationships: 8 reasons for dishonesty

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Do you ever wonder why people lie in relationships? It seems a mystery at times. You would think that love, kindness and a fear of hurting your spouse or partner would deter dishonesty. Culturally, lying seems to be accepted, but when it happens in a relationship, it can be devastating. Broken trust, decreased affection and other possible effects on your marriage or relationship are results of deceptive behavior. Why would anyone do this?
How to Forgive my Spouse For Lying

How to Forgive My Spouse for Lying

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Throughout my years of counseling, I have had many wives and husbands plead to me to give them the answer to how to forgive their spouse. Many times the reason is because they feel betrayed or deeply hurt by dishonesty. As I am sitting here, it occurred to me that it would be helpful to provide this information to others I can't reach through counseling.
Reasons for God's Design in Marriage

9 REASONS FOR GOD’S DESIGN OF MARRIAGE: Marriage represents God’s design for order and priority in life

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God's design is perfect. Do you believe that? I do. I don't believe in a God who is imperfect, so his design for things, essentially how he designed things he created, is perfect. You heard in my last post, "God is a God of order." God designed things to be in order.
Reasons for God's Design in Marriage

9 REASONS FOR GOD’S DESIGN OF MARRIAGE: Marriage is God’s original design for procreation

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Procreation is when a man and a woman create child together. Duh! Why is that important? Because it can't be anything other than a man or a woman! Sounds simple, but our culture and society wants to make marriage more than just one man and one woman.

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